Peonies Talk

For a week now, I am no longer alone. I have a toddler, the toddler’s mother and a personal assistant living with me in my apartment. Going home at not-long-ago an empty place was never the same way again.Having people around you is way much better than filing your space with gadgets, needless noise and invisible therapists. I have been living alone for about six years now.

It was a novelty to be alone in china but I reached my limits on my third year. I was itching to go home and be with family and friends and my wishes were granted. But I did not stay long with my family as I have to be billeted in a barracks as a consequence of my military work.I lived alone in an officer’s quarters for more than a year and then, I left the service and lived somewhere in Taguig-alone, again.

Being alone, no matter how busy you can get, is an open invitation for loneliness. It was an uphill battle to get sane. It was a struggle to keep up and sustain oneself especially so that in all those times, I was literally reeling over heartaches and separations.It was a coming to terms with my choices to withdraw my past and live anew.It was never easy. The healing process took some time and more time.

It was a cycle.But I guess, I would not have to suffer the same way again. No man is an island,really.

~ by tigerlila on June 14, 2009.